Excuses for Missing Work that Your Boss has Never Heard
As we’ve pointed out, in other posts, a couple of the keys to good excuse delivery are research and rehearsal. The other one is originality. Originality is always important but it is especially important when delivering excuses to your boss. When giving excuses for missing work to your boss, having an original excuse shows that you have leadership qualities. It shows that you are creative and can think out of the box. Heck, your boss might even promote you, but I wouldn’t count on it.
Original Excuses for Missing Work
1. My wife hid all my shoes from me.
2. My neighbor said if he saw me come out of the house he’d kill me.
3. The city dumped a huge pile of sand in my driveway.
4. I got stuck on level 2 of Angry Birds
5. I stayed home in solidarity to all the kids working in sweatshops in China.
6. I had to meet with my son’s parole officer.
7. My electricity went off and my alarm clock said it was 12:00 am when it was really 7:00 am.
8. My wife straightened up the house and I couldn’t find my keys.
9. I was up all night with a colicky baby.
10. We got snowed in.
11. Our albino tree frog got out of his cage.
12. Somebody left the gate open and the cows got out.
13. The landlord changed the lock on the garage and I couldn’t get access to my car.
14. A huge tree fell in the driveway and I couldn’t get out.
15. My wife got lost in a snowstorm and I had to go find her.
16. My boyfriend said he’d kill me if he saw me, so I couldn’t come out of the house for 3 days.
17. A police helicopter kept flying over my house and announcing things like don’t come out – stay inside your house.
18. The gas meter reader tripped over a bunch of garbage and stuff I had accumulated outside. His pants got all muddy so I washed and dried his pants for him and by the time I got done it was too late.
More Tips for Using these Excuses
Rehearsal is always important for good excuse delivery. We recommend standing in front of a mirror until you can say your excuse with a straight face. Research is also important. A good boss is liable to ask questions. For example, if you tell your boss you had to meet with your son’s parole officer, your boss might ask about what crimes your kid committed and what the penalties are. You would do well to chose a believable crime ahead of time and look up the statutes for your state. That way you won’t be caught by surprise when giving your boss excuses for missing work.